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'elf Expressions Ezine

Get Hold of Your Elf!

"Get hold of your 'elf!"


Your weekly collection of positive tips, hints, and advice offered with humor, inspiration, and other goodies for anyone who is inclined to read. Guidance, mentoring, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.

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Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 10 — Issue 18 — August 24, 2010
Published every other Tuesday


Hi, everyone. This is the day that the Lord has made, and I shall rejoice and be glad in it. I really am having to remind myself of this big time today, as thus far it has not exactly been a red-letter day for me. And no, I'm not going into the gory details with which you would be bored anyway. Nonetheless, I shall rejoice and be glad with His help! And I'm really going to need that! :-)

So, on to today's issue.


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In Remembrance of
September 11, 2001

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Smile!

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Signature



 

If my people, which are called by my name,
shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek
my face, and turn from their wicked ways,
then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive
their sin, and will heal their land.

—2 Chronicles 7:14



Contents:

Top Sponsor
Weekly Contest
A Healthier You
Feature Article
Test Your Bible Knowledge
Today's Chuckle
Today's English Lesson
Guest Article
Inspiration
Etcetera


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Contest


Results of last issue's contest, when the question was — What future Soviet dictator was training to be a priest when he got turned on to Marxism? The answer — Joseph Stalin. See Steve Barwick's offer above. (Steve's quick, readers, so answer now to beat him in next issue! :-)

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Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

—Will Durant



A Healthier You


There is so much conflicting information out there in the alternative approaches to health care. Being a senior carrying around extra poundage that, in the past, I have not been able to shed no matter what I've tried, when my stepsons told me about a certain protein shake that they were using to melt off their excess fat, and further that I didn't have to "move" to achieve results, I jumped on it.

To date, I've been able to shed 16 pounds, but I'm not going to try to sell you on this product, as good as it may be. My point here is that I just read straight from Dr. Richard Schulze, for whom I have a great deal of respect, that too much animal protein causes loss of calcium via urination! Not good news!

Calcium is crucial to the bone health of seniors, and I do not relish the thought of breaking or shattering a bone, especially without even falling, as that is not even necessary for bone shattering or breakage. You could just lean your elbow on a desk and fracture wrist or elbow!

Now we all know that the body needs protein, so what to do? Choose the right protein. Non-animal sources are nuts, nutritional yeast, fresh juices, wild salmon, tuna, eggs, organic Greek yogurt (less sugar), quinoa ("keen-wah") grain, goat cheese, almond butter, and peanut butter (natural or organic only with salt as the only added ingredient).

Some will say that eating organic or grass-fed meat doesn't count, because it has not been given hormones and antibiotics. True, that variety of animal protein does not have added hormones or antibiotics. But it is also true that it still contains naturally concentrated hormones that are responsible for turning a 300-pound calf into a 3,000-pound cow in one year! There is no doubt that grass-fed is better, but hold it to special occasions, or learn to do what Asian people do. They eat normal quantities of meat, but the difference is that they simultaneously consume large quantities of vegetables along with it.

One suggestion: If you fix a beef roast, for example, cut it in half and use only that portion to roast (freezing the other half for another time) with lots of carrots, onions and potatoes. Cooking this way, smaller portions of meat are available for each, and they will fill up on the veggies. Serving a raw salad before serving the roast also will take the edge off appetites.

Just because you cut down on meat, that is not all you need to do. White flour products play a huge part in destroying bones, and aside from bread, that includes pasta, crackers, macaroni, etc. Don't buy them.

And don't think you will get your calcium from milk either. Regular milk contains a bound calcium which is not easy to assimilate, but its high protein also causes your calcium to leech out in the urine. And this means any milk, even raw! (Milk is meant to grow a baby into an adult; once weaned, the child should stay weaned.)

The two top liquids that are calcium high and protein low are fresh orange juice and fresh carrot juice. And note that the key word here is fresh!

Note: Herbs are great, but remember, you take them only in ounces, not in pounds as is the case with food. So don't expect herbs to overcome all the "anti" calcium foods you consume. The same applies to vitamin supplements, no matter how pristine the quality.

This is by no means an exhaustive treatment of the subject, but I'd like to finish by recommending weight bearing or lifting exercises. Weight bearing equates to walking where the entire weight of the body is carried about. Start slowly and go from there.

The same applies to weight lifting. Start with three-pound weights. The key to success here is lifting s-l-o-w-l-y. Even after you've done it for awhile, always do it slowly. You incinerate more fat and build more muscle that way. You can always add more weight gradually.

Finally, stay off the scale, because you will be building muscle (which is heavier than fat), so staying off the sale will prevent you from getting discouraged.





Wise men profit more from fools than fools from wise men;
for wise men shun the mistakes of fools, but
fools do not imitate the successes of the wise.

—Cato the Elder



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A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

—Lao-Tzu



Feature Article


Churches Today are Impotent!

Typical signs outside churches: "Undersea Adventure" — "Country Breakfast" — and such signs on church marquees are now commonplace. They have usurped even the cutesy sayings, such as "This church is prayer conditioned," and "Much Prayer, Much Power — No Prayer, No Power!"

Drove by a village church the other day. They had just had the parking lot repaved and striped ... eight parking spaces were for the handicapped. My question: "Why are churches providing spaces for handicapped people, when the gospel of Mark 16:17-18 specifically states, 'And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.'?"

Doesn't this church believe this Biblical passage; if not, why not? If not, they are being selective and do not believe the whole Bible. Why is that?

A person is either a Christian (a follower of Jesus Christ) or he is not. You cannot have one foot in heaven and the other in hell.

Stop sitting on the fence and make a decision! A commitment! As I know I've written before, consider a plate of bacon and eggs. The chicken was involved, but the pig was committed. He gave it all—should we do any less in committing ourselves to the Lord, or to anything else?

Stop hanging around the kitchen if heat bothers you! Learn to cook for yourself. Don't wait to be served every Sunday morning or Wednesday evening.

Open the "cookbook" of the Bible and learn for yourself the recipes for living the "gourmet" Christian life. Don't miss out just because you prefer that someone else do all the cooking and serving!

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Article penned by Mary Wilkey, publisher of 'elf Expressions Ezine:
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As Featured On EzineArticles



 

Test Your Bible Knowledge

Why do believers need not worry about those Christians which have died?

a — They are assured of a place in heaven.
b — They will be transformed into angels.
c — Jesus will welcome them into the kingdom.
d — They will be raised to life again.

Scroll down for the answer.





Freedom is not worth having if it does not
include the freedom to make mistakes.

—Mahatma Gandhi



Today's Chuckle


How's this for intelligence?

Great orators ...

"One man with courage makes a majority." —Andrew Jackson
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." —Franklin D. Roosevelt
"The buck stops here." —Harry S. Truman
"Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country."                                                                             —John F. Kennedy

And, from today's geniuses ...

"It depends what your definition of 'sex' is." —Bill Clinton

"Those rumors are false ... I believe in the sanctity of marriage."
                                                                                                 —John Edwards
"I invented the Internet." —Al Gore

"The next person that tells me I'm not religious, I'm going to shove my rosary beads up their ass." —Joe Biden

"America is ... is no longer, uh, what it ... it, uh, could be, uh, what it was once was ... uh, and I say to myself, 'uh, I don't want that future, uh, uh for my children.'" —Barack Obama

"I have campaigned in all 57 states." —Barack Obama (Quoted 2008)

"You don't need God anymore; you have us Democrats."
                                                                          —Nancy Pelosi (Quoted 2006)

"Paying taxes is voluntary." —Sen. Harry Reid

"Bill is the greatest husband and father I know. No one is more faithful, true, and honest than he." —Hillary Clinton (Quoted 1998)

And the most recent gem of wisdom from the "Mother Moron":

"We just have to pass the Healthcare Bill to see what's in it."
                                                                 —Nancy Pelosi (Quoted March, 2010)

How lucky can we be to have such brilliant minds in charge of our once great country?





"Life's tough ... it's even tougher if you're stupid."

—John Wayne



Today's English Lesson


Seeing the same elementary mistakes over and over again has prompted this publisher to write an English lesson each issue. Look for some of these lessons to be repeated, because the mistakes are!

Think I've run out of fresh fodder for this feature? Hardly. Not when I raed things like this: "He wasn't even phased by it"! Of course, he wasn't, because he couldn't be. But he might have been fazed by it!

"Faze," according to my dictionary, means to disconcert, discomfit, perturb, fluster, or confound, while "phase" means a stage in the process of change or development.

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Reminder: We have a reasonably priced editing/proofreading service for articles or even entire ezines. Just email: adm@elfexpressionsezine.com





"Of the four wars in my lifetime, none came
about because the U.S. was too strong."

—Ronald Reagan



Guest Article



Search Engine Ranking — How to
Improve Your Site's Placement
by Elaine Currie

If you have a business website you will know that there is no such thing as too much traffic (assuming, of course, that your intention is to make a profit). The majority of "zeroed in on" traffic comes via search engines either as a sponsored result through pay per click (PPC) advertising or through ranking in the search engines' organic results.

To get a decent amount of free search engine traffic to your website, you need to get your site listed as high as possible in the organic search results. This means preferably on page one and definitely within the first three pages.

Here are four things to keep in mind when you are trying to get your website a prime rating in the search engines.

Content Is King.

You will undoubtedly have heard that before: it's one of the things the SEO (Search Engine Optimization) experts agree upon. Note, however, it is not just any old content: the search engines love good original content.

If you build a website by filling it with articles that appear on hundreds of other websites, your site might eventually get listed by the search engines, but it won't appear high up in the listings; it will probably be ranked so far down, no human visitor will ever set eyes on it. You need to write your own articles or, if you are unable to do this, pay a ghost writer to write articles for you.

Quality Links Improve Status.

Note that you need "quality" links to improve your website's standing with the search engines. It is a waste of time to buy links or create an obvious "link farm" swapping links with all and sundry. Writing articles helps here also.

An excellent way of obtaining one way links back to your website is by writing your own articles (or having them ghost-written) and getting them out on the article directories. Publishing articles is arguably the best way of obtaining links. Exchanging links with other websites is still useful but reciprocal links do not impress Google and, all too often, where Google goes the other search engines follow.

Keywords Count.

If you target the wrong keywords, you will be making life harder for yourself and setting yourself up to fail from the start. Before you rush in to try to stake a claim to number one position with a hugely popular keyword, take a look at the competition.

If a great big established website has been sitting at number 1 for eons, do you think your little newbie site has what it takes to topple the champ? Unlikely! You probably won't even stand a chance of getting in the first ten pages within the foreseeable future if the keyword is really popular. Far better to do some careful research and find keywords that are not only relevant to your website content but also have fewer sites competing for the traffic.

For listings to really count, your website needs to be ranked within the first three pages of a search result and the fewer sites there are in competition, the greater your chance is of getting your website into a good position.

Change Is Good.

Keep adding fresh content to your website and also check that your links all work. Nothing upsets the search engine bots more that stale content and broken links. If your website becomes stagnant it will sink into oblivion and this will probably be a sudden massive plunge rather than a slow slide down into obscurity.

Don't be afraid to remove content that becomes outdated or is no longer strictly relevant to your website. A website can change direction quite dramatically as it grows, so be on the lookout for redundant content and get rid of it. The bots will like this tidying up as much as they like fresh content.

Getting your website high ranking in the search engines takes time and more than a little effort but it is worth it: it is deeply satisfying to know that your website is getting visitors through your own SEO efforts. The fact that this traffic is free is also heart-warming.

===========================================================

If you want to generate money from home, you will find more search engine optimization tips and useful home biz resources at Elaine Currie's Work-At-Home Directory http://www.HuntingVenus.com.





Idiot Sighting:

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself, and for her life's sake, could not understand why her system would not turn on. She's a deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office, no less.





Answer to Bible trivia:

d — They will be raised to life again.
See 1 Thessalonians 4:14



Inspiration


The Grandfather's Table

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table, but the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about Grandfather," said the son. "I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor." Therefore, the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since grandfather had broken a dish two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence. One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up."

The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days, he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently, provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day the building blocks are being laid for the child's future. Let us be wise builders and role models.

Always remember: "What goes around, comes around!" However, "Treating others as you would treat yourself or that you would like to be treated will grant you more love than not!




Etcetera

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