"'elf Expressions Ezine"

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'elf Expressions Ezine
Get Hold of Your Elf!

"Get hold of your 'elf!"

Your weekly collection of positive tips, hints, and advice offered with humor, inspiration, and other goodies for anyone who is inclined to read. Guidance, mentoring, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.

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Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 9 — Issue 10 — March 10, 2009
Published every Tuesday

Hi, everyone ... I wish to draw your attention to the public service announcement in today's issue ... it could save your life! Then find an article on G-M foods in the Healthier You section (which also could be labelled "politically incorrect," as well ... appalling at best).

There is a 21-point recipe for success in the Feature Article section, six ways to grow your subscriber base in the Internet Resource section, and the Guest Article tells about an unusual drug problem in America.

Finish up in the Inspiration Section with an interested article, "Beyond Religion." Hope you enjoy them all.

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In Remembrance of
September 11, 2001

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If you enjoy this ezine, you can help it grow faster by introducing 'elf Expressions to just one other person—because the faster we grow, the more we all benefit from the promo copy. Thank you!

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If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
—2 Chronicles 7:14

Contents:
Top Sponsor
Weekly Contest
Public Service Announcement
A Healthier You
Feature Article
Test Your Bible Knowledge
Today's Chuckle
Today's English Lesson
Internet Tips & Hints
Guest Article
Inspiration
Etcetera

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Contest

Results of last issue's contest, when the question was — What is the most massive tree ever?
The answer — The world's most massive tree ever (by trunk-size) was the Lindsey Creek tree, a coast redwood (Sequoia sempervirens) in California, USA. It had a total trunk volume of 2,549 cubic meters (90,000 cubic ft) and a mass of 3,300 tonnes (3,248 tons). The tree blew over in a storm in 1905. The name is widely thought to honor Sequoyah, also known as George Guess, inventor and publisher of the Cherokee alphabet.
Our winner this week is Sylvia Kittey ... congratulations, Sylvia ... see her promo above.

For our subscribers only: Be first to submit the correct answer to the following question and receive the next available top sponsor slot gratis. So answer this:
What is the largest commercial building in the world?

Send to contest@elfexpressionsezine.com and be sure to include your promo copy with your entry. I will no longer contact winners to request it. Several people have missed out having their copy published, because they did not include their ads with their entries!

"The farther a man knows himself to be from
perfection, the nearer he is to it."
—Gerard Groote

Public Service Announcement

Important Safety Info About Clothes Dryers
The heating unit went out on my dryer! The gentleman that fixes things around the house for us told us that he wanted to show us something, and he went over to the dryer and pulled out the lint filter. It was clean. (I always clean the lint from the filter after every load.)
He took the filter over to the sink and ran hot water over it. The lint filter is made of a mesh material ... I'm sure you know what your dryer's lint filter looks like. Well, the hot water just sat on top of the mesh! It didn't go through it at all!
He told us that dryer sheets cause a film to form over that mesh, and that's what burns out the heating unit. You can't see the film, but it's there. It's what is in the dryer sheets to make your clothes soft and static free ... that nice fragrance, too.
You know how dryer sheets can feel waxy when you take them out of the box ... well, this stuff builds up on your clothes and on your lint screen. This is also what causes dryer units to potentially burn your house down!
He said the best way to keep your dryer working for a very long time (and to keep your electric bill lower) is to take that filter out and wash it with hot soapy water and an old toothbrush at least every six months. He said that makes the life of the dryer at least twice as long ... how about that!?

A Healthier You

From Natural Health Solutions:
In Ghana for a Codex meeting on the labeling of Genetically Modified Foods, Dr. Barbara Schneeman memorably explained the US policy forbidding the labeling of Genetically Modified (GM) foods.
She said that FDA research and independent research has shown that consumers will reject genetically modified food if they know it has been genetically modified.
But the FDA has determined administratively [remember, they do no safety testing, nor do they demand any before approving a genetically modified food] that GM and non-GM foods are identical and, therefore, believes that to give consumers accurate information would be FALSE AND MISLEADING (sic!).

"What you bring away from the Bible depends
to some extent on what you carry to it."
—Oliver Wendell Holmes

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Feature Article

Recipe for Success

1 — Enjoy what you do or do what your enjoy.
2 — Concentrate on solving problems instead of selling your product.
3 — Learn whatever you can to better yourself.
4 — Talk to everyone you meet.
5 — Take better care of our health, so that you can have more energy to do more work.
6 — Ask people to allow you to help them reach their dreams.
7 — Find out what people are interested in and help them get it.
8 — Give your all.
9 — Believe your beliefs and doubt your doubts instead of doubting your beliefs and believing your doubts.
10 — Have your own conference call to help your people.
11 — Get a phone system that makes you available to your people.
12 — Pay extra in any way that you can (hotel bills, gas, paycheck for a day) for your associates.
13 — Believe in people more than they believe in themselves, and help bring out the best in people.
14 — Work as hard as you can, so you can be a role model for others to follow.
15 — Being passionate and commiteed to what you do with persistence.
16 — Pray for God's help and guidance.
17 — Mimic the good characteristics of successful people.
18 — Listen to motivational tapes daily—a tape a day keeps discouragement away.
19 — Believe in your organization, and offer them encouragement and praise daily.
20 — Be open and available to talk to anyone at anytime at any place.
21 — Constantly be learning new things that will help you grow personally.
—Author Unknown

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You may reprint the above article with this info intact:
Article penned by Mary Wilkey, publisher of 'elf Expressions Ezine:
http://elfexpressionsezine.com
To subscribe, email sub@elfexpressionsezine.com?subject=subscribe

Test Your Bible Knowledge

Fill in the blank: "That men may know that thou, whose name alone is __________, art the most high over all the earth."
1 — Immanuel
2 — Solomon
3 — Jehovah
4 — David
Scroll down for the answer.

Spiritual maturity begins when we realize that we are God's guests in this world. We are not householders, but pilgrims; not landlords, but tenants; not owners, but guests.
—C. Willard Fetter

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The great man is he who does not lose his child's heart.
—Mencius

Today's Chuckle

One for the Ladies

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," I replied, "What does it say on your shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."
And they say blondes are dumb ...
Q — What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A — A rumor
Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, to love to forgive him, and patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for strength, I'll beat him to death. Amen.
Q — Why do little boys whine?
A — They are practicing to be men.
Q — How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A — Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manual."

I can see how it might be possible for a man to look down upon the earth and be an atheist, but I cannot conceive how he could look up into the heavens and say there is no God.
—Abraham Lincoln

Today's English Lesson

Seeing the same elementary mistakes over and over again has prompted this publisher to write an English lesson each issue. Look for some of these lessons to be repeated, because the mistakes are!

Readers, did you know that some people are now being greatful for things? Yes, it's sad but true. I'm finding this more and more. Of course, the writer meant "grateful," but in haste to put out this garbage, relied solely on a spell checker.
Now everyone knows (or should know) that spell checkers (at least, those with which I am familiar) are not concerned with context. As long as a word is correctly spelled, usage is not an issue with them.
So, if you use a spell checker, be aware that you still need to manually proofread for usage accuracy. Your readers will thank you!

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Reminder: We have a reasonably priced editing/proofreading service for articles or even entire ezines. Just email: service@elfexpressionsezine.com

Peel a banana from the bottom, and you won't have to pick the little "stringy things" off. That's how the primates do it. Take your bananas apart when you get home from the store. If you leave them connected at the stem, they ripen faster.

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Internet Hints & Tips

Six Tips to Skyrocket Your Subscribers
by Wendy Maynard
Do you want to grow your subscriber list to your ezine or newsletter? Then it makes sense to invest some time to make sure your website effectively promotes it. There are a number of ways you can make it easier for your site visitors to sign up.
First, take a look at your website right now. When visitors arrive at your site, would they be able to sign up for your newsletter immediately? Or do they have to go through several layers of pages and content in order to subscribe? Your goal is to make it as simple and straightforward as possible to become a subscriber.
Here are six strategies to implement on your website that will help you build up your list by making it easy for people to subscribe:
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"When life's problems seem overwhelming, look around
and see what other people are coping with."
—Ann Landers

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Guest Article

The Drug Problem in America

The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a methamphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining county, and he asked me a rhetorical question, "Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?"
I replied, "I did have a drug problem when I was young.
"I was drug to church on Sunday morning.
"I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.
"I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather.
"I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults.
"I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort in everything that was asked of me.
"I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profane four-letter word.
"I was drug out to pull weeds in Mom's garden and flower beds and cockleburs out of dad's fields.
"I was drug to the homes of family, friends, and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood; and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.
"Those drugs are still in my veins; and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, and think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem, America would be a better place."

~Author unknown~
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When it's dark enough, men see stars.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Answer to Bible trivia:
3 — Jehovah is correct.
See Psalm 83:18

Inspiration

Beyond Religion
by Okwudili Umeweni

"A certain man went down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and fell among thieves, which stripped him of his raiment, and wounded him, and departed, leaving him half dead. And by chance there came down a certain priest that way: and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side. And likewise a Levite, when he was at the place, came and looked on him, and passed by on the other side.
"But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him. And on the morrow when he departed, he took out two pence, and gave them to the host, and said unto him, Take care of him; and whatsoever thou spendest more, when I come again I will repay thee" (Luke 10:30-36 KJV).
This was Jesus teaching an inquisitive lawyer (who came to tempt him) who his neighbor was. This story is one of the most familiar stories in the Bible, but there is more meaning to it than I have always thought.
As I took an in-depth study on this passage, it shook me to find out that the man beaten and robbed by thieves was actually ME ... battered, bruised, wounded, confused and left to die in misery and pain by the devil.
The different religious groups I looked up to couldn't come close to me, lest they became unclean or excommunicated as their religion and law has taught. There I was dying and writhing with pain, and those I thought would help just passed by me.
All hope now lost, I had almost breathed my last, when I felt the strong, comforting hands of Jesus Christ (being the Samaritan), breaking all religious laws, reach out to me in my mess and clean me up. He poured out His own costly blood (the oil and wine) on my mess, cleaned me up, and took care of me, bringing me into His own Kingdom and making me a partaker of His divine nature (2 Peter 1:4) and a joint heir with Him (Romans 8:17).
As if that wasn't enough, He left me in the care of the Holy Spirit, giving Him all that is needed to take care of me (John 16:15), and promising to come back again to make all things perfect. Hallelujah!
That was actually how we were before Christ found us. Christianity is not about religion, but a true, heartfelt relationship with God and our fellow men.
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son" (John 3:16 KJV). "Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren" (1 John 3:16 KJV).

An evangelist cum author, http://www.okwudiliumeweni.com
http://faithwriters.com

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