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'elf Expressions Ezine

Get Hold of Your Elf!

"Get hold of your 'elf!"


Your weekly collection of positive tips, hints, and advice offered with humor, inspiration, and other goodies for anyone and everyone who is inclined to read. Guidance, mentoring, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.

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Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 1 - Issue 36 - November 27, 2001
Published every Tuesday evening


Well, one holiday down in the annual round. Now all I have to do is figure out what to do with all the leftovers still hanging around. I don't know about everyone else, but I'm about "turkeyed out" —and "companied" out! (interrupted here to take a phone call) My son just totalled his pick-up—hit a deer. I understand that there is an abundance of deer here in Ohio this year, so be careful! I don't think my son is hurt, but his truck is history!



In Remembrance of
September 11, 2001


Smile!

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Never look down—you may miss a rainbow or a sunset.



CONTENTS:

Ad Contest
Subscriber in the Spotlight
Feature Article
Today’s Chuckle
Today's English lesson
Internet Tips & Hints
Guest Article
Inspiration
Etcetera


AD CONTEST


For our subscribers only:
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You cannot climb uphill by thinking downhill thoughts.



SUBSCRIBER IN THE SPOTLIGHT


The first subscriber to submit his or her personal profile sharing with the rest of us all about who he/she is, background, family, location, interests, hobbies, goals, dreams, etc., will be spotlighted right here next issue—and yes, an email and/or URL may be included!

Send to readermail@elfexpressionsezine.com

I'm Seqkat, the publisher and owned human of the Cats of Village of Tidbits! >^..^<

I'm a mother of two children, and they keep me very busy and happy! I home school them, and count this a daily blessing that I get to spend every day with them. I get to see them grow up and be there!

I believe the ultimate mission for every single human being upon this earth is to learn what love REALLY is, and to share TRUE love with everyone with whom we come in contact. I also believe this can be our greatest challenge, as some humans seem not to want love! :o) So I personally rely on God's strength and grace to get me there!

With that mission in plan, I offer to help others with their internet marketing through advertising and training others. I offer both of these for free, with some paid advertising offers, so I can feed my cats and my children! I make it my highest goal to treat everyone who comes to the Village with only the kindest regards, to hopefully give you a grand smile, and make your day even brighter! I love the gift of JOY—and selfishly—I want to give you JOY—for from it, I gain the greatest JOY!!

And so I always sign off—as I'm signing off here—

In His Joy,
Seqkat     >^..^<
"He (Jesus) sent two of His disciples, saying,
'Go ye into the Village'..." Luke 19:29-30
http://www.VillageofTidbits.com

Village of Tidbits - FREE Ezine - Traffic Generation & Advertising Tips & Inspiration & Yes, FREE Ads! http://www.VillageBusinessPage.villageoftidbits.com



 

If you're headed in the wrong direction,
God allows YoU-turns.



FEATURE ARTICLE


WANTED: PASSIONATE PEOPLE

That headline should preface every employment and business opportunity want-ad ever written.

Unfortunately, not only is that not the case, but the basic concept escapes most potential employers and biz-opp recruiters.

And what escapes me is, why?!

Passion should be the single most important requisite for any recruit anywhere, any time.

A person lacking passion lacks the basic ingredient for success, period.

Fortunately, passion--unlike knowledge or experience--can be conjured up.

A super sales manager can instill it in his reps.

A super recruiter can instill it in those he signs up.

BUT--and this is a BIG BUT--the difference in those two situations is that it is the JOB of a super sales manager to instill passion and enthusiasm in his reps.

It is NOT the job of a super recruiter to instill passion and enthusiasm in those who sign up for the opportunity he offers.

The only job of a super recruiter is to sort through those who respond to his opportunity.

Sort for what?

Simply, for those people who are already passionate and enthusiastic.

For those who see what that super recruiter sees in his opportunity.

Very frankly, those who don't see it from the outset won't have the passion and determination to do their own sorting.

So the enthused people will. The unenthused won't.

Some will, some won't, so what?

Find those who will, and share your passion and enthusiasm with THEM. Feed off each other. Buoy each other up, but don't waste your time trying to pull up some half-hearted Henry who doesn't see what you see.

And remember: You often have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince!

****************

Feel free to reprint the above article with this info intact:
Article penned by Mary Wilkey, publisher of 'elf Expressions Ezine: http://elfexpressionsezine.com

To subscribe, email me at subscribe@elfexpressionsezine.com


 

A BIBLE RIDDLE

Question — Of all thirty-nine or forty parables that Jesus taught which one can only be found in the book of St. John?

Answer — The parable of the Good Shepherd in John 10:1-18.






After paying his traffic violation fine and being handed his receipt, the irritated motorist snapped, "What do I do with this?"

"Save it," advised the clerk. "When you get four of them you get a bicycle."



TODAY'S CHUCKLE


Idiot Story

Michael Anderson Godwin made News of the Weird Posthumously. He had spent several years awaiting South Carolina's electric chair on a murder conviction before having his sentence reduced to life in prison. While sitting on a metal toilet in his cell and attempting to fix his small TV set, he bit into a wire and was electrocuted.




The weak will never forgive.
Forgiveness is an attribute for the strong.



TODAY'S ENGLISH LESSON


This is a little humorous departure from our weekly English lesson. I found it in Margo Waletzko's AplusBiz News:

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

  1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
  2. The farm was used to produce produce.
  3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
  4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
  5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
  6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
  7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
  8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
  9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
  10. I did not object to the object.
  11. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
  12. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
  13. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
  14. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
  15. They were too close to the door to close it.
  16. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
  17. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
  18. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
  19. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
  20. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
  21. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

Let's face it: English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

Borrowed from the Funky Pages http://www.funkypages.com





Happiness was made to be shared.



INTERNET HINTS & TIPS


INCREASE TRAFFIC BY WINNING AWARDS FOR YOUR SITE

There are a variety of Internet companies that give out website awards, such as Pick of the Day, Cool Site of the Day, or Yahoo! Many surfers will check out these award sites in the search for web pages to look at and will visit the sites that win these awards.

How can your site win an award? While every award site will have their own standards, here are 3 factors that award sites will look for:

1 — User Interface — The site should get the viewers attention and invite them to explore further.

2 — Content — Your site should offer something of interest or useful to the user.

3 — Feel — Make sure your pages load fairly quickly and are easy to use.

How do you apply for the awards? You could search out and individually submit your site to all the award sites or go to:

http://www.1second.com/AwardSites.htm

Win an AWARD!





It's all in how you look at it!!!

A ninety-eight-year-old man was ecstatic when he broke a mirror.

"Why are you so happy?" a friend asked him. "Don't you know breaking a mirror means seven years of bad luck?"

"I know," answered the aged man. "Isn't it wonderful?"






I cannot be what I am not.
I must work with what I've got.
So for the cause of originality
I had best just be me.

The harder I try to be what I'm not
The sadder becomes my earthly lot.
All my faults I begin to see.
Lord, I come, just being me.

Oh, God, I come "just as I am,"
Knowing for my life you've got a plan.
I'm not all I'd like to be,
But I must present to you
Just plain me.

Oh, God, I come as nothing grand
And place my lfie within your hand.
Make me, O God, the very best me
That by your power I can come to be!



GUEST ARTICLE



Direct Talk On What It Takes to Succeed
by Joe Bingham

A lot of the time, especially in my humor writing, I am extremely sarcastic about Internet marketing. I make fun of the hype, the advertising, and some of the marketing strategies used. At times, my readers may wonder if I believe there is even a point to the whole thing.

In all seriousness, however, there IS money to be made over the Internet, and it can be done legitimately.

I've been online working to create wealth from home for close to a year now. I am making money. My business is profitable.

I am not so stupid or arrogant to claim that I know everything, or how to do everything. I'm sure there is more for me to learn, and there will never be an end to that learning.

However, I can tell you that I KNOW now what it takes to succeed. This is not knowledge gained from reading others' advice, although that helped lead me to it. This is knowledge gained from practical application and experience.

If there is any one message I could have reached out with to everyone involved, or even thinking about being involved, in online business, it would be the following:

"Making money on the Internet takes time, effort, WORK, a unique, valuable product or a unique presentation of valuable products, commitment, and persistence. However, the potential rewards are GREATER than anywhere else, especially in regards to what one person can do on his or her own with an incredibly small financial investment."

There it is. Wonder no longer about the "secrets" of making money on the Internet. That is the first BASIC that you must understand. Do NOT buy any more general marketing information from anyone. All they will tell you is that same thing.

From here on out, focus on the specific information you need, and avoid the generalizing products. That one paragraph above IS your basic information as to what it takes to succeed.

Look at it again. Memorize it. Hang it up on the wall with my picture and throw darts at me if you want, but read it every time you remove the darts from my forehead.

I know it sounds simple, maybe even too simple, but that's half of the point. People looking for instant wealth still skip right over those simple basic concepts.

After you've read it for a while, break it down into two parts. One part is what I've touched on earlier in this "Direct Talk" series, the product. It must have a unique value in some way.

The other part to that statement is YOU. Time, effort, work, commitment, and persistence are all qualities of the businessman or woman, NOT the business. The business only portrays what the business owner lives.

You CAN create a successful Internet business. You CAN make money from home. You CAN be independent and create your own personal wealth. However, it will not happen to you. You have to MAKE it happen for yourself.

My business will be around, because I WILL be there to make it work. You've got to do the same for yourself.

------------------------------------------------

"Making money on the Internet takes time, effort, WORK, a unique, valuable product or a unique presentation of valuable products, commitment, and persistence. However, the potential rewards are GREATER than anywhere else, especially in regards to what one person can do on his or her own with an incredibly small financial investment."

Written by Joe Bingham, owner of NetPlayNewsletters.com
http://www.netplaynewsletters.com



INSPIRATION


Excerpted from "The Secret of the Ages"
by Robert Collier

The secret of all the success of psychology, of all the cures of metaphysics—that God is to each of us exactly what we believe HIM to be—a stern Judge, a blind Fate, an impersonal Principle, or a loving Father.

It is up to us to choose which we shall have. But whichever we choose, that is what He will be to us.

Of course, God Himself doesn't change. It is simply that He has given us free will to avail ourselves of as much or as little of Him as we wish.

When we experience sickness or other evil, it is not He that gives it to us. We have turned our backs on Him, that is all—and just as when we turn our backs to the sun, we see the shadows, so when we turn our backs to God, we get the shadows of poverty and sickness.

He has all of life. He has all of health. He has all of riches.

And in proportion as we believe in Him and His willingness to share these good gifts with us, in that exact proportion shall we receive.

"As your faith is, so shall it be unto you."




Etcetera

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